How to Help Someone with PTSD: What to Say, What to Do, and What Not to Do
Do you have a loved one with PTSD? Learn what to say, how to respond to their symptoms, how to avoid re-traumatizing them — and how to prioritize your own well-being.
"I don't know what to do." "I'm afraid to say the wrong thing." "I try, but nothing works." "I'm tired."
These are the words of people who love someone with PTSD. Here is a practical guide.
1. What Helps: Talking
- "I believe you."
- "You are not alone."
- "Your reactions are understandable, given what you've been through."
- "You don't have to explain. I'm just here."
- "What would be helpful for you right now?" (Ask, don't guess.)
2. What to Do
- Learn about PTSD: understand it's a neurobiological disorder, not a "choice."
- Maintain stability and predictability.
- Respect boundaries and triggers.
- Help with practical matters (make an appointment with a specialist, accompany them).
- Be present — you don't necessarily have to "fix" things.
3. What Not to Do
- "Just forget about it / pull yourself together."
- "Everyone struggles, but they cope."
- "That was a long time ago" / "it's time to move on."
- Pressure them to recount event details.
- Retraumatize — show videos or materials related to the trauma without consent.
- Take symptoms personally (detachment, irritability — these are symptoms, not an attack).
4. Take Care of Yourself
You cannot cure a loved one's PTSD, and it's not your responsibility. Your responsibility is to take care of yourself. Seek your own support: therapy, groups for family members, friends. A burnt-out person cannot help.
Talk to our AI psychologist psybot.app. Read also: PTSD and Relationships.